6 Signs You’ve Found a True Friend: My Personal Insights on Real Friendship

We’ve all sung the praises of genuine friendships, claiming we’d prefer having one true friend over a group of pretenders. Maintaining healthy relationships is a boost for your mental health – after all, there’s an Akan proverb that advises, “If you want to go fast, go alone, but if you want to go far, go together.” It’s the wisdom behind the notion that teamwork makes the dream work. Together, there’s an abundance of accomplishments waiting to unfold. That’s why it’s a downright shame if your circle includes friends secretly harboring ill will, those who’d rather stunt your growth than see you flourish.

Now, let’s dig deeper into what really makes a true friend, shall we?

1. Genuine Support:

A real friend isn’t just there for the good times; they’re your anchor during the storms. They cheer for your victories and hold your hand through defeats. Whether you’re contemplating a risky career change or thinking of dyeing your hair neon green, a true friend is right there, ready to back you up. I feel truly blessed to have these kinds of friends in my circle. It takes time to truly know someone’s true colors, which is why I deeply cherish my close friends whom I’ve known for over a decade. We’ve had our ups and downs, but the ups have always outweighed the downs. We know each other’s triggers, and when we’re busy and can’t physically show up for one another, nobody takes it personally. However, when one of us is in need, we always show up for each other, and that’s what I love the most. This is a special shout-out to all my sisterfriends, I love y’all!

2. Unfiltered Honesty:

Sugarcoating is for desserts, not friendships. A genuine friend will tell you the truth, even when it’s not what you want to hear. They’re not afraid to be the voice of reason, offering constructive criticism when needed. After all, honesty is the foundation of trust. However, I am very careful who I am fully honest with, because not everyone can handle honesty. Some will judge it as you being a ‘too-known’ as Ghanaians would call it or someone that is Mrs. Perfect. Which is very unfortunate! That’s why I prefer not to have too many close friends, not everyone will understand me and that’s absolutely fine. Personally, I appreciate it when others are honest with me and give me feedback on something I did/do that they dislike. This gives me the chance to reflect and change bad habits and I love it when I’m given the opportunity to do so. This also improves the quality of friendships. Nobody is perfect, most of us are daily striving te become a better person, so it is so important to have grace for one another and be honest even if it hurts.

3. Celebration of Uniqueness:

True friends embrace your oddities and uniqueness. They celebrate the very essence of what makes you, you. Whether it’s an unusual hobby, a peculiar sense of humor, or an unpopular career choice, a real friend treasures these aspects and wouldn’t have you any other way. They won’t try to change you or convince you to do things you don’t want to do. When I gave my life to Christ I had to distance myself from a lot of people. This decision wasn’t about feeling superior to them; it was primarily for my own sanity and to avoid giving in to peer pressure. This is another topic for another time..

If you constantly feel pressured by your friends to do certain things or go to places where you don’t feel comfortable, that’s a red flag. If they make you feel bad for being different, you should question whether you really want to invest in that kind of friendship. Unique people often don’t have many friends anyway, so don’t worry if you realize you don’t have a large social circle. It’s all about quality, not quantity.

In summary, A true friend will respect your norms and values and will do anything to see you happy.

4. Reliability in Times of Need 

Life isn’t always rainbows and butterflies. In your lowest moments, a true friend is the hand reaching out to pull you back up. They don’t bail when times get tough; instead, they show up with a pint of ice cream, ready for a heart-to-heart. These are the friends you need. Nobody is an island; we all need a shoulder to cry on. We love the feeling of being supported and having people to rely on in our times of need. It’s important to have emotionally strong friends who won’t feel annoyed or exhausted when you’re going through a tough season in life. This is also another topic for another time, but it’s worth mentioning that you need friends who are emotionally available and also believe in intercession. When you have friends who love to pray, you are blessed because, during your darkest seasons, instead of gossiping or playing the blame game, they will be on their knees interceding for you. As a woman of faith, this is something I look for in a friend.I have a friend who, every single time she sends me a voice note to congratulate or encourage me, adds a short prayer. I truly appreciate this. Do you want to be a true friend? Be a reliable friend who loves to intercede!

5. Shared Laughter and Tears

The best moments in life are those shared with your friends, be it tears of joy or cries of frustration. A true friend is your companion through both the uproarious laughter and the ugly-cry sessions with sound. LOL! They’re always there to witness the different seasons of your life and truly go through those seasons with you.

6. Encouragement for Growth

True friends aren’t threatened by your success; instead, they champion your growth. They push you to pursue your dreams, providing the extra nudge when self-doubt creeps in. A genuine friend sees your potential even when you might not. They push you toward greatness and won’t stand by while you belittle yourself. When you can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, they create that light so you eventually can. It takes optimistic people to be able to do this., so choose your friends wisely!

In this life journey, a true friend is like the rarest gem—precious, enduring, and irreplaceable. If you’re fortunate enough to have one, cherish and nurture that friendship. If you’re striving to be a true friend, remember that the essence lies in authenticity, loyalty, and unwavering support. At the end of the day, you are what you attract. So, if you feel like you lack authentic friendships, ask yourself: Are you real? Are you kind? Are you as selfless as you think you are? There is nothing wrong with self-reflection; in fact, it’s essential! Life is too short for anything less than genuine connections, so be a true friend! Catch you on the next blog post!